Curiopathy

Its all out there now mucking up the crisp air
My moist breath most likely wasted on ignorant ears
I owe much to few and nothing to many
But for my own sake, or stupidity:

Brought up with love
Used up with apathy
Caught up in confusion
Tangled up in sheets
Held up by distractions
Given up by myself

You'll find me no longer

Bogged down with weight
Tied down with pain
Thrashed down in currents
Thrown down in surrender
Put down by fools
Stared down by strangers

You'll see me no more

Unknown

In unknown fear of unknown men
With unknown thoughts, I live
With unknown parts and unknown past
And unknown gifts to give

The unseen depths of unseen wounds
Unseen scars will hide
The unseen pain of unseen tears
From unseen eyes that cried

Through unknow waters over unknown sand
Teems unknown life I crave
The unknown search in unknown vain
My unknown sail to grave

Conflict

So conflicted are nature and wisdom
Body and mind in constant battle
"Give up, move on," says one to the other's tears
The constant ache and sudden shudder at your touch steals the first's powers

It's winter again, the season of void
My hand, surrounded by cold wind only, freezes
Not brave enough to reach out and touch you
Too affraid to return to my empty pocket

So mid-air I pause, not going to, niether fro
It is impossible to return to safety's bind
And having not the faith to leap

I fall

The fence

You took my heart long ago
You've caused me to build fences
Through which my eyes can only see
The tempting fruit from which I am so cruelly forbidden

My lips ensured from rotting poison
Sweet meat and juices my tongue hath passed
Weakening my body, collapsing my spirit, clouding my faith
My mouth still echoing with bitter aftertaste

I carelessly fumble the gate's key
Lost in the greens and heads of clover
I lie in its soft, false comfort unknowingly
I wrongly housed my fate

For I have trapped the wolves

Part II

For I have trapped the wolves
And they are ravenous
Attracted to the fresh blood waiting to be drawn
The first bite being the most desirable - I am overtaken

It rips through me - skin, flesh, and soul
I burst open with pain, my eyes ever wide
No longer with innocence, but the undesirable shock of knowing
The first wolf looks not at them

More swarm in packs of lustily green eyes
Wishing to ravish themselves upon me
Hunger only having grown in false satisfaction
They prey upon me thirsting to quench their desire

As I lay on the increasingly trampled patch of clover
I wonder if I will become unrecognizable
Only one piece of me would they leave untouched
My heart - though you took it long ago

Haunted

The ache goes on of lonely silence
The only time I have to think... of you only
All the time in the world

To confess my love for you aloud
To myself I admit the truth
But the silence prevails in my cowardice

I fear not the words to steal from my lips
For I allow their escape so often
Each glow in the night sky hath individually taken heed

Nor frightened of your eyes upon me
Although I have never grasped their story
And the depth of their secrets unknown remains

My single fear must then be the end
My mind's obcession, day's dreams, and night's work
Sole occupation of my being to be haunted by you

Clangs of the old clocks enhance the night air
But only your faded voice echos past my ears
Your ghost nears and passes over me in the cold
Real warmth so close but that I can never feel again