Never Made Love

I've been on my knees
Been begged, "Baby please"
Been siezed and squeezed
And teased and eased
I've heard all your sleeze
And I aim to please
But I can't appease
All of these "Come to me's"

I've had my hands kissed
Been told I was missed
In my ears hissed
Had a hot hot tryst
Glistened with mist
Made a counting list
Made a hollow fist
I think you get the gist

But I've never made love

I've been made to moan
Changed my tone
Waited by the phone
Heard the radio crone
And the talk shows drone
Been shown, on loan
Had my oats sewn
And chilled to the bone

I've danced in the rain
Parked at Lover's Lane
Kissed a Dane
Ran fingers through mane
Been made insane
Refused to feign
Tried to wane
Felt the pain

But I've never made love

Behind closed doors
Don't ask for more
Cause as the sandy shore
Is like the ocean floor
So's the hollow bore
Of a body's core
That they tore
And left me sore

I've read the text
I've been perplexed
I've been messed
And made real stressed
I've been exed and vexed
Pressed and carressed
And you know what comes next
Although I've had sex

I've never made love
Oh I've never made love